On the Jon Tesh Radio Show yesterday (The radio here is terrible. My cd player is broken. Don't judge.), Mr. Tesh was saying that for the first few months of a relationship people show only the best sides of themselves, so it's wise not to make any big commitments in the first 3 months. From an objective, rational standpoint, I think that's pretty good advice.
But I obviously didn't live it. The day after our first date, Travis and I had a bbq for some of our friends. Travis was moving to Tacoma the next day to be an intern at Marine View Presbyterian church, and I was staying in Spokane for the summer to nanny. Right before our friends started showing up, Travis asked me if we should define our relationship. I said that we should just wait and see what happened. I was being smart and cautious and taking things slow, trusting that God would reveal to us if and when we should start dating. Then our friends came over, and I started bringing plates of meat to Travis at the grill outside, and back to our friends inside. On one of those trips through the kitchen, surrounded by friends and holding a plate of food, I looked at Travis and realized that he was my husband. Not that he could be or that I wanted him to be, but that he was. It couldn't have been more clear if there were a booming voice from heaven. It was everything I could do the next week and a half (about the amount of time it took for him to have the same realization) not to accidentally blurt out that I loved him. I would have married him right there in the middle of that messy kitchen.
All that is to say that advice is great, until a miracle happens in your kitchen and you're suddenly handing a plate of salmon to the person who'll tie your shoelaces when you're too old to bend over.
If he had been wearing this sombrero, maybe I would have realized even sooner.
2 comments:
Does it really make that much sense to find out whether one person's worst self is compatible with another person's worst self before getting married? Another theory is that one of the benefits of marriage is that it reveals our worst self to us so we can let it be put aside. Although I don't see how Mr. Sombrero is going to bring out the worst in you. Look at that smile. You were smart to get married first and ask questions later.
It turns out my computer gets wireless downstairs after all! This is the first time that's ever worked. So I opened your blog to show it to Grandma and read her this post. She laughed and had no comment, which I think is good: she did not change the subject. She did not free-associate. She was FOCUSED on this blog post.
And maybe that's because it's so lovely. I really, really like you. I am so glad you find the right man for the shoelace-tying job.
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